Dithering? Seriously?

(there are not very many people who can make me swear. but this guy ...)

Cheney's face alone is bad enough. But when he opens his mouth, it gets even worse.

Yesterday he accused President Obama of "dithering" on the Afghanistan situation. Here is the quote:

"Having announced his Afghanistan strategy in March, President Obama now seems afraid to make a decision, and unable to provide his commander on the ground with the troops he needs to complete the mission.

"It's time for President Obama to make good on his promise. The White House must stop dithering while America's armed forces are in danger. Make no mistake, signals of indecision out of Washington hurt our allies and embolden our adversaries."

Yes. Indeed. What on earth are you thinking, President Obama? Stop thinking, and just act!! Hurl those bombs. Deploy those troops. Tap phones. Waterboard. DO SOMETHING!!

Oh, wait. Didn't we get into this situation because somebody acted without thinking the whole thing through?

Didn't we march off in the wrong direction, believing we would be "greeted as liberators" in one place while we "dithered" in the country where the real enemy was lurking?

Didn't we "dither" for 8 years on silly little domestic issues like health care and financial regulation, weakening our own situation to the point of near-collapse?

Perhaps it's time to think for a change. To plan. To take measured, thoughtfully-considered steps, one at a time, to get us out of this quagmire the Bush administration created.

Dither that, Mr. Cheney. You ... you ... ditherer, you.

~~~

Conspiracy Theory

(yes we did. is that good or bad?)

~ Date: July 2008

~ Location: Secret Bunker

~ Participants: Anonymous, high-ranking government officials. Let's randomly call them GWB, DC, and Whoever Was In Charge Of The Republican Party At That Point (Probably Rush Limbaugh, but we'll go with RP).

DC: Thanks for coming, W.

GWB: No problem. You know I'm always at your service. Hey, could you read this book to me? It's my favorite.

DC: Not again. You know the caterpillar comes out just fine in the end.

GWB: Pleeeease? Just once?

DC: After we have a little talk. This is important. Focus. RP has some information.

RP: Things are not going well for McCain.

GWB: What do you mean? I thought the polls were pretty close so far.

RP: Exactly. He could actually win. This is not good.

GWB: Don't we WANT him to win??

RP and DC: NO!!!!

RP: He has to lose. It's our only hope. The economy is sinking like a rock. The housing market is a mess. We haven't done a thing about health care. Not to mention the auto industry, the wars, unemployment, Social Security, Medicare, gitmo -

DC: Stop crying, W.

RP: We have a plan. We lose this election. We get Obama in the White House. The poor sap will have no choice. He'll have to spend money like crazy to try to get out of this whole fiasco. He'll try to get health care reform through. He might even try to close Guantanamo. And all we have to do is sit back and criticize!

DC: It's beautiful! I love it!

RP: We've got the talking points ready. He's a socialist. He's bankrupting the country. He's leaving a legacy of debt for our grandchildren.

DC: I'll go on a speaking tour! He's leaving us vulnerable to attack. Heh heh snarl snarl ...

GWB: But ... but ... how can we make sure McCain loses the election?

RP: We've got that all figured out. Have you ever been to Alaska?

~~~

O.I.C.

(stop reading between the lines! that's not allowed.)

Have you ever seen that old joke about ducks? It makes no sense, until you look at it a certain way. Here's a little part of it:

C.M. DUCKS
M.R. DUCKS
L.I.B.
M.R. DUCKS

(See em ducks? 'Em are ducks? 'Ell I be! 'Em ARE ducks!)

And on and on and on. It was very funny the first time.

Anyway, I haven't seen any ducks lately, but a few weeks back I kept seeing this face every time I turned around:

(this is NOT a face I want to see when I turn around)

Mr. Cheney was all over the news, talking about how safe he kept us back when he was President. I mean King. I mean - what was he again? - oh yeah. Vice President.

He defended the need for "enhanced interrogation" and said that anything goes in times of war. He even said that Obama is making the country vulnerable to terrorists. You remember, right? I complained about it in a previous post.

At first I thought he was on a book tour. Or maybe he was hoping to run in 2012. (Palin-Cheney 2012? There's an interesting thought!)

But then, some new headlines started to emerge.

• Massive Bush Surveillance Program Had Limited Effectiveness
• Pelosi Claims CIA Hid Details On Waterboarding
• Cheney Told CIA Not To Discuss Program With Congress
• Democrats Seek Criminal Investigation

O.I.C.
C.Y.A.

Makes perfect sense.

~~~

Torture

(no! please! make it stop!)

He's baaack. Dick Cheney has been making the rounds with his one-man show called "Ok It Was Torture But You're Still Alive So You Ought To Be Thanking Us." To me, the real torture is seeing his face over and over and over. Nothing personal, but I just can't stand the man.

I don't know which is worse - that snarl ...

("I. Said. Get. Off. My. Lawn!")

... or that smirk

("Heh heh, I'm only pretending to be feeble. Just wait till this inauguration is over. I'll be EVERYwhere!")

Sometimes he breaks into an actual smile. Makes you wonder what's really going on ...

(f*rt ... "Sorry Nancy.")

Of course, I do believe that everyone has some redeeming qualities. Even Dick Cheney. Maybe some day, somehow, he will do something that will make the world a better place.

("Ready, aim ...")

~~~