Monday, August 3, 2009

War of Words

(that's good. don't smile. how about a little scowl?)

Quick, what's the first thing you think of if I say the name John Kerry? Flip-flop, right?

This, in a nutshell, is the Democrats' biggest problem. They do not know how to use their words.

Oh sure, President Obama is a wonderful orator. But more and more, I am thinking that he needs to take a lesson from the Republicans.

~ Obama says: "The economy is stabilizing. Now we need to recapture the spirit of innovation that has kept America moving forward."

~ Republicans say: "Socialist. Socialist. SOCIALIST. FASCIST! SOCIALIST!!"

~ Obama says: "We must do the hard work necessary to seize this unprecedented opportunity for the future of our economy and the health of our families."


~ Obama says: "We have chosen hope over fear, and unity of purpose over conflict and discord."

~ Republicans say: "Was he REALLY born in the United States? I don't know. I suppose it's possible. ANYTHING is possible!"

Come on, Prez! You need to hire a gutsy little copywriter! Who will work for very little money if you put her on television from time to time! And maybe promote her blog as well!

Here are a few little tips:

First, you need to USE MORE CAPITAL LETTERS!!

Also, be sure to add lots of EXCLAMATION POINTS!!! AND DRAMATIC WORDS!!!

Finally, put each of your phony but very exciting points into an email, and send it to my friend Sammy. She will immediately forward it to everyone on the Internet.

Now, here are some catchy tag lines. Free of charge. Try them out! Let's see if we can beat them at their own game.

"Health insurance companies are secretly taking over your computers FOREVER AND IMPLANTING RADIOACTIVE TRACKING DEVICES IN YOUR BRAIN!!!"

"The Republicans want the economy to SHRINK!! They plan to DESTROY the government so THEY CAN RULE THE WORLD FROM THEIR SECRET BUNKERS!!!"

"Is Rush Limbaugh secretly an intelligent, fair-minded, compassionate Democrat? I don't know. I suppose it's possible. ANYTHING is possible."


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